It happens, not very often, that we put ourselves in dead ends. Its like a sort of trap you carefully build, step into absolutely convinced, to then suddenly realize that you're not sure whether you want to be in it or not. At that point the anxiety becomes just a little more than just annoying. You become desperate, starting to evaluate how and why you're in it.-Didn't I fucking promise myself never to do this again? To put me in such a situation so as to become choiceless....
I'm right there now. Asking myself these damn questions, wondering why the fuck I've done it again. I think about the people who surround me, and to which level I've commited myself and others to things.
Fear of commitment. Probably. The thing is that when I end up in this trap, I tend to hurt people, badly.
I honestly don't know what to do right now with all these thoughts and feelings. Put them in a jar would be nice. Throw it away. Or, put myself in a space capsule, and take off...like Laika.
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